Don't do something ....as if you're hiding something

If you have done something that shouldn't be done (e.g. printing out recipes for your weekend party or health recipes to stay healthy!), and someone important walked to your desk and he is someone who will appraise your work. Don't hide that piece of paper hurriedly under his nose and looks so suspiciously guilty of espionage! Be apologetic and upfront if you're really asked about it (say something that makes it forgiving) rather than appearing guilty and having something to hide.

Who learn most when teaching other? The teacher or student?

ANSWER: Teacher. Have you shared your thoughts with someone today? Suggest you share with someone worthy of your thoughts...

You tell me. It is so easy, huh???

Before you advise or teach someone something (share ideas or experiences or technique), the person does not know and is ignorant or blur. When you open the big mouth, he knows. You tell, so I know. When someone knows already and get it easy, they will think hey it's not that difficult and they know and it doesn't seem like a big deal. So, how do you tell and how do you make it worth its weight in gold. Whatever experiences shared and taught to others is worth its weight in gold for someone who doesn't know. 

Between the thin line of I don't know what not or how about this | You tell, so I know and it seems so easy. Remember it is a thin line and when the other person knows already, he may react "Uh-oh, so easy. Nothing speacial. Yeah, I know. What's the big deal?" But, before you tell him, he could be banging his head against the wall for the ignorance, so how do you make your idea stand out big time. Talk about it deeply. Peel the onion skin one by one. Phase out the discussions over several sessions. Make the listener pay each time. Ground and grind the issue. Make it difficult to learn. 

Break it into different sub-topics. Drill down.  

Do not be afraid to elaborate so others understand. It is better to paint a story of comprehension rather than give one line factual statement.

Challenge the person for an answer: Dare the person to speak up. Dare the person to answer

There are some situation whereby there are just some annoying people who snigger, make rude remarks in the background when one is speaking in the group. It doesn't help if one speaks up or ask questions and put into the spotlight because one wants to know more or there are matters that should be pointed out to the speaker. The annoying people are usually cowards who linger in the background because they are afraid to ask questions in public and faced others or they are simply annoying because it is in their nature to be annoying. In this situation, challenge them to answer or debate you in public right in front of the group.


When you put them into the spotlight, they will freak themselves to death and would pose less troublesome to you later. Simply ask them rational questions that they should answer. If they snigger some stupid answer in the background to the question you have just asked the speaker. Holding the microphone and pointing to the snigerer in public and ask him "The question is directed to the speaker? Are you the speaker?" He is obviously not the speaker and would tame down.


There are other options available such as "What is so funny about the question?" Ask the person to identify himself and he may freak out because the fact he is sniggering in the background is because he is a coward in the first place. These cowards would be so scared and so surprise that people are not afraid of them. They snigger because they think they can be annoying and get away in the dark. Or, suggest that they become the speaker if they are so good and know everything.

Which one is better? The bad or the worse?

If you have an option (or idea) that you want accepted. Make that a good case. Now that is easier said than done. No one buys an idea that sounds too rosy or too good to be true. So, balance it up mention about the bad side too and make it a bad case. But, wait. Make out another scenario and make this other case so bad that it is a worse case scenario. Between the bad and the worse case, guess what will people choose? That's right the bad case, because the bad case is better than the worse.

Selling bad stuff...works too!

When you open the newspapers, what do you read? All the bad news. It is said that psychologically one feels better to know there are other people worse off than us. (It is a bit sad but because we are in a rat race, anything that makes us better off, makes us a tad happier. Bad news are good for newspapers)


Whether you like it or not: Selling bad stuff works. Not just for the newspapers. Selling bad stuff about things around you lends some relevance to what you are saying. It may help to make you stand out as being observant or caring. Pointing out bad stuff to help prevent people from falling into the same black hole may indeed make you stand out. Pointing out bad stuff may put you in a negative light. So, end it with the intention to help the other person and make it explicitly clear.

Effective Communication: How to Promote Yourself at Work

It is not easy to promote yourself. You have made a positive contribution for the benefit of the company. But, your bosses were not around to witness the situation. Yet, you want them to know so that your efforts are recognized and they remember you for the next job promotion. If you make blatant loud claims, people may think of you as a show-off. Yet, some people do it so effortlessly and get recognized for the next job promotion.

How do you impress your bosses and co-workers so that they think well of you and recognize your contributions? Is it possible to do so without being ostracized? Yes, you can.

Here are some practical suggestions:

Tell An Interesting Story
Report like a journalist. Describe what happened rather than boasting loudly and focusing on you. Give details of how things happen from A to Z, highlighting the interesting angle. It doesn’t have to be a unique story about aliens falling from the sky. An interesting but ordinary daily encounter can be a good starting point for your story. Because it involves you, people will remember what you contributed.

Add Some Light Humor
Interject some light humor. Nothing beats a funny story to draw attention. If it is funny, people will hear you out. A witty person is often seen as more intelligent. It doesn’t have to be a 5-Star joke that you memorize from some bestseller joke book. It can be a simple statement of how unexpectedly someone behaved or how different a situation turned out. Laughter can bring people together. Laughter also lightens the atmosphere.

Bad Vs Good. Before Vs After
Describe the situation before you solved the problem. How bad it was, and how good it is after you have resolved the matter. It gives magnitude towards the difference you have made to the situation. Compare the worse (negative) that it was and how well (positive) it turned out after you have intervened.

What Is Your Reason
Try not to make stand-alone statements. Support your statements. Add a reason why you say or do something. When people understand why you’re doing something, they will tend to be more acceptable to what you say.

Who Else Agrees With You
Who else is in agreement with you? When you have support from other people, it will tone down people’s (your listeners) inherent defensive nature to critically evaluate your statements. People now are not dealing with you alone. They are dealing with you and a few other people who happen to share the same opinion. With strong support, your statements will go a long way.

Visit www.how2talkeffectively.com for some top quality communication books not found in Amazon, ebay, etc..